The girls are now officially 11 months old (i know. drop your jaw. how the hell did that happen.) and I am seriously feeling so great about our daily life! I feel like we are FINALLY a family of 6 now, instead of a family of 4 and 4. Yes, I did my math right, when I say 4 I mean parents & boys and parents & girls. Anyway, so yeah. Our routine is down & the girls are so amazing that I don’t ever really worry about them not getting their naps bc they are THAT good. (you can hate me now cause I would have hated me if I read that too)
I feel like for the last 3 years “Michelle” has been lost in the jobs of : Mom, Wife, Cook, Maid, Poopy Diaper Changer, Baby Maker. I remember posts I used to write about being angry/upset in the evenings when I’d be picking up the mess of the day. Grumbling, “Poor me, all I ever do is pick up after everyone else.” I hate to even think about those times when I’d do that, but it’s just the reality of it. I was unhappy because I didn’t make time for ME. I defined “me” time by going to the grocery store. Friends, although going by yourself to the grocery is fantastic, it does NOT qualify as “me” time because you are still doing a job that’s for your family! (i say 3 yrs bc the 4th year i was still teaching which enabled me to still have a sense of me)
I didn’t realize that until recently though….and my oldest is 4.5 yrs old. Funny how it takes so long to learn simple lessons when you’ve been having kids over the last 4 yrs.
Basically I have learned not to feel bad when I want to go out for a 3.5 mile run. I don’t feel bad going out to London for the day with friends. I don’t feel bad having a girls night & staying out WAY past my bed time.
I feel like a rambling mess but for the longest time I almost felt guilty for taking time for myself, as if it was ‘selfish’. But the funny thing is, although it’s doing something for yourself (which is where i got the selfish part) it’s not selfish because it’s being healthy for your mind which in turn makes life SO much better for your family! I often wonder what Jesse thought when I’d be grumbling each night. Poor guy. And I feel so blessed that he never ONCE complained about me complaining.
I guess what I’m trying to say is, taking 10 minutes to do your hair in the morning so you feel better about yourself is totally fine. I still don’t do it every day, but I do try to do it a few times a week. I’m sure the husband appreciates seeing me look like a woman instead of like someone who threw on yoga pants & threw her 2-day post shower hair back in a pony. EVEN if he doesn’t even say anything. (that’s a whole other post)
Also, take time for your marriage. For us that’s a hard thing to do because we are an ocean away from family so we have to rely on our friends. And when you have 4 kids that’s a little hard to do. Thankfully we are so blessed with dear friends who take our kids for us with open arms. Hubby & I were able to enjoy an entire day in London together a few weeks ago. The last time we did that was back in March & I was still in my PPD mode that it wasn’t even that great. (it was a rough time for us that’s for sure) That day in London was amazing! We got to hold hands, we got to not carry 5-hundred-freaking bags to make sure we have all the goods for kids/babies. It as just wonderful. One day of “us” makes for two very happy parents 🙂
So pretty much I do my hair now & am a much better Mom, Wife & most importantly – I’m a much better “Michelle”.
How do you remember to still be “you” in the midst of Mommy/Wifehood?